The truth

So, the truth is, that, I am really, really, really homesick...and I'm finding it really difficult to deal with. I 've been here for three and a half months already, but I still miss my home, my family, my friends, my cat, my job....everything. Oh, I know it may seem somewhat glamorous that I got married and moved to New Zealand, and perhaps it may also seem selfish of me to be saying these things in the first place, but this is how I feel. I feel sad and lonely. If we could move back to Canada in an instant I would, but that won't happen for a long time. I wish that I had had more time to do the things that I wanted to do and spend time with those that I love before leaving Canada. I wish that it hadn't been so rushed. I feel like I have no friends here other than Becks and it is hard for me to fit in. I don't fit with the young marrieds (because they are all in their early 20s and none are in my ward anyways but they are friends of Andrew's), I don't really fit in with the people who are my age because they already have kids...I don't really fit anywhere. Sometimes I feel like I don't even know who I am anymore...I feel like i get up, do dishes, tidy, do laundry, answer phone calls, feed the cat, play with the cat, check emails, read blogs, make dinner, clean up after dinner, go to bed. I feel like this is all that I do in my life...that all I am now is just a housewife. I just wish I had my friends and family close by that I could go to. I miss all of you so much it hurts and I can't help but cry. Why does this have to be so hard? Why?