I slept in until 11:36 or something like that. I got up at 6am to feed Kuma who was anxiously meowing at the bedroom door (he is not allowed in our bedroom anymore since he started biting at the material under the bed and Andrew discovered it) and then went back to bed. What's the point of getting up at 6am when it is dark outside and I don't need to be anywhere? So I went back to bed intending on getting up at 8am instead. Well...it didn't happen. I haven't been sleeping well lately - I can tell because I have been having very vivid and bizarre and active dreams. Last night I dreamt that I had been abused and went to tell Andrew about it. The night before I dreamt that I was walking through a dark alley and was being chased by a drunk man and I got to the hotel I was staying and tried to open the door but it was locked so I kept on yelling "help!" but no one heard me and then I think I woke up shortly after. These are the kinds of dreams I am having...is it any wonder that I wake up feeling tired?
I read today for about two hours in my pajamas. I am reading The Memory Keeper's Daughter and it is not bad. I am about halfway through and want to finish it quickly so that I can read the other book that I got out of the library (Their Eyes Were Watching God). IF anyone else has any ideas for good reads please let me know.
I should be working on my 125 hour montessori project but I don't want to. I'm not motivated to. I need to also practice music for Sunday. Last Sunday's music time wasn't so great. I had a feeling it wouldn't be because I hadn't practiced the song that much and I was feeling incredibly tired that day. My only consolation was that the nursery kids had fun playing the instruments that I brought in as we sang I am a Child of God. I look forward to going in and seeing those little ones even though it is chaotic. I have a lot of respect for nursery leaders...they sure have their hands full.
Today I phoned the NZ teacher's council to find out what I need to to to register with them. I need another police clearance (how annoying...more money spent) and documents and it will cost $120.00.......everything is costing money these days and I am stressed about it because Andrew is always stressed about it. It is not my fault but I still feel guilty. It turns out I may have to go to Australia for a few days to stay with Andrew's family because Immigration sent my application on for a furthur medical review and this takes 3-4 weeks apparantly and the rest of my application won't be processed until this review comes back. It may come back clean and it may not. If it doesn't than they may ask me to get furthur tests done. The problem is that my Visitor's Visa runs out on April 6th so.....yeah....I may have to stay here unlawfully or withdraw my application....get my passport...go to Australia and come back to get my visitor's visa renewed and then re-submit my application. What a hassle. Sometimes I wonder if all of this was the right decision....everything just seems to be such a challenge and I just wish I could get a bit of a break...you know?
4 comments:
Hang in there Leash, I think things will get better for you.
I hear you completely! But if it's meant to be it will work out. I'm learning that...slowly but definitely.
Like Lisa said...Hang in there...it's only a matter of time!!
Yikes a bee. I too would be nervous, but you know, it has worked out up to this point so keep on keeping and all will be well.
life would be fun without challenges :) hang in there it will all work out.
I just read Snow Flower and the Secret Fan (one book just a long title) I twas really really good. I totally recommend it.
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