Today (make that yesterday since I'm finishing this blog today) has been trying for me. Bethany has a cold and consequently is very emotional and out of sorts. Since she is not usually like this it is hard for me to know what to do to help her cope. I'm trying to give her lots of cuddles and hugs when she wants them. I hope that she gets better soon. This is the one downfall of sending your child to nursery - they catch everything!

I've been feeling a little down in the dumps these past couple of days....I'm not sure exactly why.....but I just feel kind of lonely and friendless lately. I mean I do have friends, but when we moved last December we ended up being in a new ward which is much, much different than our last one. I LOVED our last ward. The people there were so friendly and welcoming and so many people went out of their way to get to know me (most of them already knew Andrew) and invite me to things. I really felt loved and fellowshipped there. I was really blessed to be in that ward after getting married and quitting my job and moving halfway across the world and trying to adjust to all of these changes. I felt like we fit right in. It didn't matter that so many people there already knew each other. People were willing to get to know me and include me in things. It was fantastic. Our new (well I guess it isn't that new since we've been in it since this past January) ward is not at all like this. It is smaller than our last one (which isn't a big deal to me) but the people there are just not that friendly. Some people are nice and will say hi to you and there are a few people (like the RS presidency and my friend Val and Mereana and Louise) who will have a brief conversation with you but I don't feel like I have that many real friends. It is hard to "get in" if you know what I mean. Or maybe the term is "fit in". It is hard to fit in with the social networks of people who already know each other. I still feel like a stranger there. I know that I need to make the effort too, and I try. I really do. I try to say hi to people and get to know them  but I often don't get much effort back. Like I said, people are polite and friendly, but they aren't really welcoming. I definitely don't feel fellowshipped in the ward. In my opinion, the ward itself lacks unity. It is almost like the members there are tired and don't want to make the effort to reach out and get to know new people. When we first started attending even the singing during sacrament was awful. People sung so halfheartedly that it felt to me like the congregation was half dead. I am sure that I sung louder than many and that's saying a lot because I'm not really a loud singer.

Anyway, I guess that I am just feeling a little lonely and down and frustrated and am really wishing I had some of my peeps close by to laugh with and cheer me up. I miss you guys. A LOT!